Navigating Food During the Holiday Season

For most, the holiday season is filled with joy, family, traditions, and of course food. It can be a time of connection, relationship building, and gratitude. Stores are filled with different types of colors, scents, music, and offerings. Generally, the holidays are viewed with optimism but for those with an eating disorder or complex family dynamics (especially that which involves food), the holidays can be nothing short of a nightmare. 

Many people with an eating disorder, in addition to those working on healing a relationship with food and body, find themselves face to face with the source of their behaviors (food) and for some the source of their triggers (family). So how does one seek to enjoy the holiday for its deeper meaning and purpose while also maintaining commitment to the recovery process? In this post we hope to offer some support for navigating and enjoying the holiday season. 

Start with reflecting on positive memories/traditions

Ask yourself: What did you like about the holiday? Are there any specific practices, games, locations, etc. that have made the holiday very memorable? Why are you celebrating this holiday - what does it mean to you? In terms of food, what have you enjoyed? Did you/do you like to partake in the cooking? Is there someone special who has always prepared your favorite dish? Reflecting on fond memories can help prepare our hearts for the holiday.

Find Support

Identify a support person ahead of time, and unfortunately Fido or another four-legged companion won’t count. We need someone to actually hold us accountable to following our meal plan, practicing mindfulness, practicing coping skills, or hearing us out when we need a break. This person can also be supportive in terms of providing emotional relief such as providing distractions, helping to enact a boundary, navigating a conversation away from food, providing a hug, or being there to remind you of why you’re doing the hard work.

Eat Consistently

Remember to eat consistent meals and snacks all day - no “saving” calories, macros, grams, etc. for the holiday meal(s). For those in eating disorder recovery, this means continuing to follow your meal plan and viewing the holiday meal as just another meal in alignment with your meal plan. For those working on Intuitive Eating, remembering to be intentional and attuned to our bodies hunger and fullness cues throughout the entire day will lead to a more enjoyable experience around the holiday meal and avoid feelings of “over-stuffing” (although this can be totally normal during holiday meals - don’t beat yourself up if you end up too full).

“Know Where Your Exits Are”

You may need a break. You may need a breath of fresh air or a space to use a grounding technique. If conversations become overwhelming, you could quickly create an exit plan - something like: “Oh! I forgot to grab something from my purse,” “I forgot my phone in the living room,” or something of the like. Make sure to check out our previous blog post on “How to Respond to Diet and Weight Loss Talk“ for more information on navigating triggering conversations and assistance with setting food and body boundaries. 

Develop a Coping Skills Toolkit Beforehand

If you see a Therapist, this would be using a DBT, ACT, or CBT skill. Identify beforehand which coping skills work for you; maybe it is deep breathing, grounding, distraction, distress tolerance, etc. It is also helpful to plan exposures beforehand. Maybe there is a particular food or scenario you predict to encounter and want to be able to practice how you feel surrounding that food or scenario beforehand. If you have the resources, do a trial run and see how it turns out!

Finally, stay true to yourself and your position on recovery. If other people choose to diet around us, that’s their prerogative. We are showing up with the desire and responsibility to nourish ourselves adequately and appropriately, prioritizing nourishment and our well-being. Savor the flavors of all the delicious food, enjoying and showing gratitude, and honoring the place we are at now with food and our bodies. 

Happy Holidays from As You Are Nutrition!